Annoyances

Day by day these annoyances are growing
I’m lit up, on fire always heating,
Teeth grinding, brain seething
Day by day there’s less of me believing
There could ever be any good inside others.
I don’t think it’s possible for me to get close to another,
Feel like it’s just an open opportunity
To be once more supremely deceived
Into thinking that anyone could feel as I do.
I don’t think anyone could feel as I do.
The world is about selfish pleasure
Irregardless of how much one may be treasured
The other is pathologically out on the roam
Fulfilling the hunger of an endless ego.
Irregardless of the amount of tears one sheds
The other only worries about their esteem being fed.
Into this generational thought I was born
Internally I live with an essence that’s forlorn,
Thoughts cross this mind of who’s friend and who’s foe,
Who’s gonna stay for good and who’s gonna up and go?
Sad to say, most won’t be in the picture for long,
Before I turn around they’ll be gone.
And from friends and this thought of mine
Another thing seems to cross this mind.
If a friend is hard to find
What ease is there in the zawjah for a lifetime?
My generation walks in and out of lives with ease
Doing whatever to whomever they please
Until they get enough, ready to move to the next
Move so quick it makes me perplexed.
Day to day these annoyances are growing
I’m lit up, on fire always heating,
Teeth grinding, brain seething
Day to day there’s less of me believing
Less of me believing.
Born in the wrong social zone,
Wrong generation, I don’t fit with my own
Brother’s and sisters. Can’t click
With the clique of this diin and it’s making me sick
to the point where I wanna just quit.
Making secret du’a to Allah for Him to elicit
The sunnah of Isa on me if He permits…
From this world I have to go into segregation
Because I’m at odds with most of the population.
All they do is bring me tribulations
and none know cuz I keep it behind Disney musical presentations.
Prison for seven years set the example
That it’s best to get away when fitnah is ample.
Like Yusuf stepping away from his troubles
I need to wash my hands of my troubles
Wash my hands of my peer babies
With their “me, me, me” mentalities
Driven by their many insecurities
To do all possible to enlarge their shallow self-esteem.
Gotta wash my hands of all these things that are so annoying.
I don’t know how I ended up in this period of time.
All I know is that it’s not mine
And even though I know it’s not mine
I’m blamed for it’s many crimes
Taught I’m the cause of disaster and breaking hearts
Using females and taking their trust apart,
Being a playa in some kind of kiddie game,
“since you are the in the age range
your ways have to be the same”
Here’s the outcast, the black sheep
Being told he’s the same as those who creep
Under the cover of dark.
Outcast forced to wear a condemning mark
Sentenced for crimes he didn’t perform.
Might as well be a new character for Mr. Hawthorne
The way I’ve been branded
Makes me think it’s a decree commanded.
Perpetual ripples of petty occurrences
Rip into waves from stressing disturbances
Rocking me in the air shocked with turbulence
All born from the drip drop of daily annoyances.

In A Perfect World

In a perfect world, our differences would be eliminated
In a perfect world would come true all that I’ve supplicated
In a perfect world I’d be able to look in your eyes again
Knowing that I could never lose them.
In a perfect world, our similarities would always rise to the surface
Only letting us focus on the qualities that are best.
In a perfect world you’d be the carrier of my beautiful 5
All 6 of you keeping my spirits high
And with all of them, you’d never stand alone in the mirror,
I’d be right beside you, next to you, your favorite admirer.
In a perfect world I’d tell you all I had to say
And you’d know what was in me everyday.
In a perfect world I wouldn’t be writing but I’d be saying this
Letting these words flow like water off mine to your lips.
There’d be no reaction from the conclusion of a dream,
No resonating pain from being snatched down when I was floating.
In a perfect world right now I’d be only laughing and smiling
Instead of being solo, only sitting and writing.
In a perfect world…is there such a thing
Or is it only some kind of fantasy?
If it exists is it for life or just fleeting,
A short living kind of being?
Maybe for only two months it breathes
Then with a struggle and a fight it leaves.
A perfect world that begins on a late summer night
And ends when a future may be in sight
In an early autumn evening…
All things are not perfect, this is true
And with all discussed I understand you,
Know why the decision that is was made
Still, it’s hard for me to just let the day fade
I know that some starts have to sometimes end,
But I also know that some things begin again.
Time will tell what’ll happen when it’s all said and done
But in a perfect world, you and I would become one.